Get all 12 John H Maloney releases available on Bandcamp and save 35%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of By The Time, All is Not Lost, Just Say It, And Then, Snake Central Mechanisms, What You Don't Know, Back to Point A, Allons-y, and 4 more.
1. |
3720 to 1
00:12
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Stumbling against the will of probability
in the infinite, indefinite, unyielding wait and see.
Wagering the future on a lapse of sanity.
Despite advice, still thinking twice, I brace for what will be.
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2. |
Desperate Measures
00:13
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I'm out of desperate measures
and it's only just begun.
Off to a running start,
but now there's nowhere left to run.
I need to catch my breath,
but that's a risk I just can't take.
There's so much ground to cover
and still far too much at stake.
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3. |
Wreckage
00:12
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Crawling from the wreckage
of what could have been,
all too aware
of my resolve wearing thin.
I allow self-doubt a moment
to consume me and then,
I set it all aside
and try to try again
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4. |
There's Your Problem
00:15
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A few more slight adjustments,
then it all will be just right
or, at least, in theory.
Though, in practice it just might
take entirely too long.
Yes, that will likely be the case,
but it could be worth the effort
or just far too much to face.
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5. |
Capacity Exceeded
00:14
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Stray tangents weaving in and out
of conscious comprehension.
Far too many data points
demanding my attention.
Overloaded, overwhelmed
and over everything.
Whatever sense I may have left
hangs by a fraying string.
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6. |
Shards
00:15
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Shards of the past,
embedded like shrapnel in my mind.
Nerves stand on edge waiting
for the slightest touch
to trigger their torrent.
Overwhelming my fragile facade
and pulling me back
into another time,
when I thought that maybe
it could be.
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7. |
Diner
00:15
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Caffeinated conversation,
hyperbolic tales of woe.
With plaintive resignation.
"There's just nowhere else to go".
Dollar after hour
spent on grease and grand designs,
to pass the night away
and read too much between the lines.
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8. |
Say When?
00:20
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Just a little bit more
is all that I need
to satisfy these demons
so desperate to feed
on the few remaining pieces
of my peace of mind
and then maybe I might
be able to find
a more permanent solution
to the problems I face
and all of those scars
that time can't quite erase,
but until that happens
I'll just have to endure
and try to make do with
just a little bit more.
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9. |
The Fall
00:16
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And so begins the slow descent,
the light fading away
as the cold embrace of the end draws near,
draining each and every day
and all around, shades of decay
lie scattered on the ground,
while skeletons stretch skyward.
Giving up without a sound.
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10. |
Loop
00:14
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Why do we keep doing this
when it always ends the same,
with little more than spite, regret
and a shifting sense of blame?
We must find something better
than this misplaced courtesy,
but we'll likely just continue
for the sake of what could be.
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11. |
Most Likely
00:18
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Thrown over the cliff
by a billion what ifs,
because I simply couldn't be sure.
A shadow of doubt
was still lurking about
and had rendered me too insecure.
Grasping for certainty,
scared of what could be.
I'm rapidly turning obsessed.
I just need to know
how it's going to go.
Maybe then I'll be able to rest.
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12. |
Bleeding Green
00:24
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Scratching at the bottom of the barrel just to find
any scraps that I can forage to maintain my peace of mind.
Eliminating anything that’s not a basic need
As my assets liquefy with such depressing speed.
Just to make it through today is all that I can ask,
but I doubt my bank account is equal to the task.
Struggling to hold the line until my ship comes in
as the waterline keeps rising and the air is getting thin.
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13. |
Doublethink
00:15
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But then again, it's hard to tell.
It might, but maybe not. Oh well.
I think it could be ... tough to say.
Just too many shades of gray
and far too much uncertainty
in any possibility
that I just don't know what to do.
I think I'll have to think it through.
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14. |
Imagination
00:18
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My imagination runs away
and I go chasing after.
Believing every word,
accepting every assumption,
and embracing every fear
without a single question.
Until all that’s left
is pure, paranoid fantasy.
That I’ve decided
makes so much more sense
than simple, uncertain reality.
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15. |
Off Hours
00:12
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It isn't quite ideal,
this living in reverse.
In fact it's quite surreal
and just a bit perverse.
Rotating counter-clockwise,
never quite catching the sun.
By the time the day is over,
it's only just begun.
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16. |
Luck
00:08
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Resigned to the inevitable,
I accept what will likely be.
While still hoping that my chances
might defy probability.
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17. |
First Encounter
00:26
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Soft lips
and gentle fingertips.
Slowly, inhibition slips
away.
With nothing left to say.
Nothing standing in the way.
We touch.
At first, it seems too much.
Never before have I felt such
a thrill.
As if time is standing still,
not letting another moment pass until
the desire we share is, at last, unrestrained,
a primal exhibition of passion unchained.
Bodies entwined, a frenzied display.
Everything else just melts away.
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18. |
Closing In
00:10
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I hate to admit it,
but I'm starting to see
that my comfort zone
is growing smaller than me.
A slow suffocation,
removing all doubt
that I must find a reason
to find a way out.
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19. |
Balancing Act
00:10
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It's all I can do
to remain intact
through this all-too-precarious
balancing act
and there's simply no point
in denying the fact
that while I cling to hope,
I still brace for impact.
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20. |
Wait For It
00:18
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Almost there, but not quite yet.
A given I'm not sure I'll get.
Sense and reason say take it slow,
but impatience has begun to grow.
Hour by hour the minutes creep,
while I wonder if I'm in too deep.
Within my grasp, but still out of reach.
Another day stalled in the breach.
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21. |
Recharge
00:14
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Still unsettled, uncertain.
Just trying to pull through
and not think too much about
all there is left to do.
Now, while there is hope to cling to,
I know it's not over yet.
I just need to take a moment
to recharge and reset.
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22. |
Poem
00:18
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Just a few simple words,
carefully arranged.
Set in stone for now,
but inevitably changed.
Some pointless explanation
of a personal insight,
a vain attempt to justify
what I already know is right.
Embellishing the commonplace
until it seems sublime,
or is it nothing more
that just a dreadful waste of time?
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John H Maloney New Jersey
John H Maloney singer. songwriter, ukulele player and poet based in New Jersey, USA
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